Googly Eyes

Sometimes skeeting isn’t about crushing on talented, under-the-radar specimens of male intelligence. With the inherent standards of skeeting, there comes an unfortunate and inverse set of dislikes. Paul Walker, it seems, embodies everything that skeeting aims to subdue.

Paul, who got his start from Disney’s “Meet the Deedles” (a *must see*), has since moved up in the ranks to complex thrillers like the Fast and the Furious, the Fast and the Furious II, and um, that last one that came out. Typecast as the typical blond-haired, blue-eyed asshole, Paul has managed to conquer this niche both on and off screen. His unskeetable characteristics include:

1) Choosing the same role. Over, and over, and over again. 

2) Playing that role extemely poorly 

3) Being 35 years of age

Actually, #3 isn’t so terrible. It’s just that

4) Dating a 16-year-old

Makes it so, so much worse.

“Paul is very happy,” says an insider, who adds that though they began dating when Jasmine, a student at the University of California, Santa Barbara, was just 16, “their age difference doesn’t scare him. He knows she’s the one.”

Somehow, I don’t think this relationship is similar to my favorite Amber Tamblyn/David Cross coupling. 

Shame on you, Paul!